Other Stories of the Weasels

[Sewer Weasel]

THE APARTMENT


The weasels were now standing in front of a door with a small glass window. On it it said, in bold letters, "THE OFFICE".
The leader knocked. No answer.

"Knock harder, Boss," Greasy suggested.

The leader knocked harder.

"Who is it?" a low, graveley voice asked from the other side of the door.

"We're here to buy the apartment," the leader told the voice.

The door swung open and there a short, bald man stood. "Oh, well, howdy-" he now took a good look at his buyers. His eyes widened and his eyebrows rose with surprise.

The leader's eyes narrowed. He cocked one eyebrow. "Yes?"

The bald man stopped staring. He looked sheepish. "I, uh.... Sorry, I just didn't expect you to be..."

"Weasels," Wheezy finnished for him.

"Well, ok. Let's get down to business."

"It would be nice if we could do that inside." The leader remarked rudely. His allies snickered.

The bald man looked embarressed. He moved to the side and held out his arm. "After you."

The weasels, with the leader first, marched into the bald man's office. The bald man shut the door and sat in a cushioned chair behind a desk. "Please, take a seat."
There was only 3 chairs, so the leader took the first for himself. Greasy had to share with Wheezy. Psycho shared with Stupid. Stupid took up about 75% of the entire seat. Psycho had to sit on the edge. He had an uneasy face on.

"You are the first willing to buy this apartment. But it seems odd not to get one in Toon Town-?"

"Yeah, yeah, we know. Just tell me what the price is," the leader said.

"50 cents a month."

"We'll take it!" the leader anounced.

"Ok. Sign here." The bald man handed him a peice of paper and a pen. The leader signed it and handed it back to the bald man. The bald man looked at it. His eyebrows rose.

"Uh, thanks, Mr..... Smart Ass."

The leader, Smart Ass, took a wallet out of his right pocket. "How much was the first month again?"

The bald man reached over his desk and put his hand on Smart Ass's hand to stop him. "The first months free." He grinned. "My treat."
He took his hand off Smart Ass's, who put back his wallet.

"Um-hmm, thanks." He stuck out his hand. "The key?"

"Oh! Right! The key.... Where'd I put the key?" The bald man checked his pockets. Then he checked under the piled of papers on his desk. Under one pile was a shiny object. The bald man grabbed it and gave it to Smart Ass, who stuck it in his right pocket. Smart Ass got up to leave. The others were glad to get up, too, after being smushed together.

"I'll be going now. See you around, baldy."

"Uh... Bye," the bald man said, as if he didn't hear Smart Ass's insult.
Smart Ass and his companions walked out of the door. Smart Ass was about to shut it.

"Uh, don't slam the-" the bald man started, but it was too late. BANG!!! The door slammed so hard, there were cracks in the walls around it. ".....Never mind."

Smart Ass held up the key, making it glimmer in the sun. "This is the answer to our problem."

"Yeah, now all we have to do is get a job." Greasy said sarcasticly.

"Excuse me?"

"Well, I mean, who's gonna hire a bunch of weasels? We're goners. We'll be kicked out before you know it. From the look of his face, that guy'd be more than happy to get rid of us." Greasy pointed out.

"Yeah, whatever. I'm sure we'll find somethin'." Smart Ass turned to go and rammed right into a wooden pole. His nose throbbed in the classic Toon style. His buddies burst into laughter. One look from Smart Ass's cold eyes made them shutup. Smart Ass turned to look at what he smacked into. He noticed a poster on the pole and he ripped it off.

"'Special workers needed. Must be more than one person/Toon. Must be slick and skilled at using guns and other weapons. Visit Doom at 3355 Gingerbread Lane for more information.'" Smart Ass read out loud. He and everyone except Stupid grinned.

"Duh, I don't get it," Stupid anounced.

"Get in the van, we're going to Gingerbread Lane." Smart Ass and all but one of his companions followed him. Stupid stayed behind.

"I still don't get it," he said and then ran off, yelling, "WAIT FOR ME!!!!" and "STOP!! I'M STILL BACK HERE!!!"

In a few moments the black van drove off with Greasy in the driver's seat.

[Sodapop]

...... Well, when are you doing the next chapter???

[Sewer Weasel]

Bite me.

I don't really know. No one relpied to this chapter, so I guess they don't like this fic, either. *sigh* Oh, well. I tried.

[Sodapop]

If you won't do the next chappy, can I?

[Sewer Weasel]

THE MEETING


“Slow... the... damn... van... down!!” Wheezy screeched as Greasy raced down the streets of L.A.
Greasy just chuckled and went faster.

“I don’t wanna barf in the new van,” Stupid complained from the back.

“Greasy, slow down,” Smart Ass said.

Greasy sighed and did as told. “You guys are no fun,” he said.

“One o’ these days were gonna get in a ‘crash,” Smart Ass replied, “and we’re gonna get sued.”

The van turned and then entered a dark tunnel. The van zig-zagged and looped through the tunnel until the weasels could see a pair of almost-glowing bright red curtains.

“This is it,” Smart Ass said.

As the van got near the exit, the curtains slid open, revealing green grass, blue skies, and most of all, animated Toons running around like wild.
Wheezy reached up and pressed a button, turning the siren on. The Toons whirled around to see the van.

“They’re here! They’re here! Run! Hide! The weasels are here!” a toad shouted as several of the startled animals dove for cover. The van turned smoothly around a corner.

“My babies!” a mother chicken yelled as a couple of her chicks ran off toward the van, which was screeching to a halt.

“They always have to do this. Always have to make a big deal of the weasels. Can’t cut us some slack, can they? Sheesh,” Smart Ass said as he hopped out of the van after Wheezy. He glared at Wheezy, who shrugged as if to say, "It's not my fault, now, is it?"

A chick ran up to Smart Ass and started pecking at his feet. He kicked it away.

“Heeey!” the other chick said. “You can’t do that to my brother!”

“Oh, yeah?” Smart Ass leaned down and narowed his eyes. The chick gulped. “How ‘bout you get outta here before I turn you into my afternoon snack, hmm?”

The chicks both ran off to their mother, who ushered them away from the weasels.

“Uh, let’s see,” Greasy said to Smart Ass as he closed the van door. Or, more appropriately, slammed it shut. “3355 Gingerbread Lane, right?”

“Right.”

“Who’d name their kid- er, character Doom?”

“Someone with alotta money, I hope,” Smart Ass said as they stepped up to a door. “Stupid, Psycho, stay here while we talk this Doom guy."
He held up his hand to knock but the door opened before he could even touch it.
A tall, lean man stood in the open doorway. He was as pale as the moon’s rays, and his clothes were as black as night. He held a long, black cane with a silver skull stuck to the end.

“Uh, we are he for the job interveiw,” Smart Ass said, nervously straightening his tie.

“Welcome,” he said. Greasy, Wheezy and Smart Ass shivered. His voice was creepy, determined, and eerily calm, and his teeth were white as snow. “Please come in.” He stepped aside.

Smart Ass and his companians anxiously stepped inside. Despite being totally creeped out, they were also almost unbearably curious. They hungrily looked around, taking in every detail.
Doom’s house was dark, quiet and gloomy, and he definitely cornered dusty. It looked like a haunted house, the kind that you might find at Halloween theme parks. Shadows danced on the walls, and when Doom shut the door, the only light came from candles that were placed randomly around the room.

“This meeting shall begin... now,” Doom said as he looked at each weasel. Smart Ass felt a cold shiver go down his spine.

[Sewer Weasel]

Sorry it took so long, guys. My computer broke.

[julayla]

It's okay. This is interesting so far. Nice work.

[netske]

Very interesting.

[Sodapop]

*claps* Not bad, not bad. Say, is that the same toad from Wind in the Willows?

[Sewer Weasel]

Yup.

[Larissa Gaines. (:]

Feb 22, 2008 11:34:19 GMT -5 Sodapop said:

Ok, I will.

& me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Larissa Gaines. (:]

put me in the talk show!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Sewer Weasel]

Oh god I am really really sorry I haven't been on here. Work and stuff. The new chapter shall appeeeear NOW... NOW... Fine I proved my point there is no such thing as magic Two Bits.
Ok I'll try to get the next chapter up by tomarrow. I pinkie promise to all of you.

[Larissa Gaines. (:]

ummmmm u fail!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


PLEEZ TB I BEG OF U PUT ME IN THE TALK SHOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Weasel Freak]

OK Epic Fail for you.